Not sure I fully understand, but here's a basic schedule to try.
Wood grows with different patterns. This causes wood to absorb more (or less) stain based on the growth pattern. To help get a more even color when staining try this.
1) When sanding is complete, get a product called Sealcoat. Apply 1 coat and let dry. Then light sand with a 400 grit paper and vacuum up dust. Then apply your stain.
2) Evaluate and determine if this is close to color you want. If not remove stain with whatever is appropriate for your stain (paint thinner if oil base, water if water base). The shellac in the Sealcoat prevents the stain from penetrating to the wood, so you're able to remove the stain with no damage.
3) If stain color is close, let it dry. If way too dark or light, go to a different color stain.
4) When you get the right color and it's dried completley apply another coat of Sealcoat, then a couple costs of the finish of your choice
Bob "Boardman" Borders